There are so many different forms of anxiety that exist today. It can be defined differently in people's eyes and how they experience it. I have friends of mine who get panic attacks from their anxiety. I have other friends who get socially awkward and have a hard time talking to new people.
For me, I never felt like I had anxiety until recently. I would say I would only get stressed out from things that are out of my control. Yesterday morning I was feeling quite anxious and I couldn't understand why. So I recorded what I was thinking at the time. Here's what I wrote:
Today I felt so anxious and angry at myself and I had no idea why. I had a great weekend with new people and got out of my comfort zone with a new gym. But, I woke up and was frustrated with myself because I didn't go to the gym first thing before work. Sometimes I'm very hard on myself about little things. Since then I have been trying to break down what that meant and acknowledge those feelings. I'll admit, I'm stressed about finances even though I'm doing well. I think it's because I'm not as clear as I need to be on my purpose. I hadn't taken as many actionable steps or made enough decisions to clearly envision this part of my future.
I meditated and took a long pause of silence. A few deep breaths later, I decided that I was not going to let this affect how I carry myself throughout the rest of the day. I decided to be more present and positive throughout the day. After reading and writing I felt 100x better. Then, I came up with a game plan. I took the time to go through my expenses and ask myself some hard questions. What expenses are fixable? What expenses are variable? Where is my leg room and how am I doing in savings/investments? After some more planning and budgeting I felt a lot better. I envisioned what it would take & how long to save x amount in order to achieve x amount of goals. I reminded myself that YES, I'm doing the inner work and making sure that I'm okay, and confident in my abilities. I'm actively accomplishing my daily habits which help me grow and unpack unforeseen feelings. I am so ambitious and want so much out of life that I can get ahead of myself sometimes.
I'm taking actionable steps and decisions in order to further improve myself. I have to take it one day at a time and a deep breath. I hadn't experienced this form of anxiety before. I was uneasy, shaky, and unclear mentally.Instead of freaking out, I took a step back, a deep breath, and realigned myself.
I know that intuitive eating, daily movement, and consistent habits are what keep me going. Working on myself is paying off. I looked back before going to bed, feeling so much better and clear with what I wanted and how I was going to get there. My habits are what keep my head on straight and one step closer to accomplishing my dreams.
What are you going through? How are you coping? What is one step you can take today to get you closer to your goals?